Happy Mother's Day!

Do I enjoy being "talked awake" early this morning by the world's most talkative child?  Do I enjoy hauling my cookies across town to watch my 90 year old grandmother slave away in the kitchen making lunch for the family?  Not especially.  But I'm reminded on this auspicious dawn of a day devoted to moms how very fortunate I am to have these people - sometimes inconvenient people - in my life.

I have friends who have lost their mothers, grandmothers, aunts, sisters and even their own sons and daughters.  I'm confident that each of them will spend time today not just celebrating the life of these beloved ones, but also mourning their losses.

It is with each of these friends in my heart that I will celebrate Day 4 of the Gratitude Challenge by loving the mothers in my life!

17.  My Mama - She taught me to cook and sew and laugh and what to pack on a picnic.  She taught me spontaneity and the value of planning.  She taught me to drive and how to buy groceries.  Where once she was a battleax full of useless opinions and advice, she is now a trusted friend and confidante.  Love you, Mama!

18.  Polly - My MIL is a dream among MILs.  She is more of a listener than a talker; more of an encourager than advisor, and I enjoy spending time with her.

19.  Nannie - My 90 year old grandmother looks and acts at least twenty years younger though she tends to move a little slower these days.  She showed me a model of what a woman could become all on her own LONG before it was cool. 

20.  Carol - My aunt Carol is unbearably cool, hip, fun and stylish.  Many mornings when I get dressed, I wonder if Carol would wear this outfit or how she would accessorize it. 

21.  Nancy - My aunt Nancy, like Nannie, was a role model of a self-made woman.  I remember working with her one summer when downtown Greenville was still a slum and not the thriving metro it now is.  We shared many meals at the Woolworth's lunch counter that year!

22.  Ruth - Auntie Roo married into the family when I was a obnoxious pain-in-the-ass precocious tween.  She somehow managed to ingratiate herself with me by flopping on my bed and discussing hairstyles and boys, and I've never forgotten it.

23, 24, 25, 26.  My great-aunts Hazel, Pat, Ina (RIP), and MaeVan (RIP) are Nannie's sisters.  Between them, I've learned the value of family and extended family.

So what if I had to get up early?  So what if I have to watch Nannie wilt in the kitchen this afternoon?  I have A LOT of "Moms" to thank God for today!  I hope you all have a wonderful day with your "Moms"!

Gratitude Day 3 (AKA Motherhood)

It's Mother's Day weekend so you can easily guess what is high on my gratitude chart!  Today, it's simply MOTHERHOOD (#16).  If you know me well, or have followed my blog for a while, then you know that becoming a mother was no small feat for me. 

I married the Mr. Wonderful when I was 34 and we struggled with infertility for years before deciding that adoption was right for us....and then the adoption took almost two years from start to finish.  By the time we brought sweet Sophia home, I was literally a bundle of raw nerves popping anti-depressants and swigging Russian beer.  Quickly, we settled into a routine that revolved completely around the child [hmmm...this hasn't changed much] and opened my eyes to REAL unconditional love. 

Before becoming a mother I thought I understood what love was, but my definition was skewed.  Now, I am not certain that you can love another adult unconditionally.  If my husband were abusive and neglectful and another twenty adjectives describing a crappy spouse, would and could I love him unconditionally?  I'm not sure, but I doubt it.

I have friends I love and have loved dearly.  The one who stabbed me in the back? The compulsive liar?  The crazy drug addicted one who gets on my nerves with her constant neediness? Not still my pals. This certainly isn't unconditional.

Pets?  I've loved pets through the years.  I've tolerated litter boxes, fur on my bedspread, and mangled corners of furniture.  And then there was Skittles 2.0.  You remember the cat who thought it was fun to pee on every surface in my home?  I had his ass gassed.  Sure, it was a great excuse to get a new sofa and replace rugs, but unconditional?  Um, no.

Parent/child relationships are different.  Parent screws up; kid moves on; relationship grows and vice versa.  Every day she hurts my feelings and causes me to question my motives - and my sanity - but would I STOP being her Mama?  Never.  My heart is overflowing with the love and affection I have for my daughter and as we approach the adoption of #2, I am praying that I'll grow up to be the person Sophie already thinks I am.

Happy Mother's Day weekend!